Reflect on Your Life Goals and Wishes, and Talk with Your Health Care Team, Doctor and Care Partners
Living with Purpose at the End of Life
Even when someone is nearing the end of life, they still have hopes, priorities, and goals that matter deeply. These may not be about curing illness but about connecting with family, expressing gratitude, making amends, or completing a meaningful project. Taking time to reflect on what truly matters allows people to live fully and with purpose in the time they have left, and make deliberate decisions about how they want to spend their remaining days.
Planning Ahead
Share your goals with your doctor.
If you are seriously ill or frail due to aging, an important first step is to speak openly with your health care team and doctor about your condition and what to expect in the days ahead. Ask questions until you feel you have a clear understanding of your diagnosis, your prognosis, and the likely course of your illness. With this knowledge, you can face the future with honesty and clarity, and accept what is coming. You can then turn your focus toward what matters most to you.
Talking with your doctor also can help your medical team support you in realizing your plans. Your doctor can advise you on filling out a POLST form, if you both agree that having this form would be a beneficial part of your advance care planning.
How to prepare for a conversation with your health care provider:
- Invite your surrogate (or proxy or health care power of attorney), a family member, a friend, in essence, your care partners and/or spiritual advisor to the conversation.
- Think about what makes a good day for you and what goals you have.
- Bring your advance care plan, such as an advance directive, living will, or health care power of attorney. If you need an advance directive, here are three options that might be helpful:
- Access free Conversation Starter Guides from The Conversation Project
- Go to MyDirectives for a free digital way to create, store and retrieve your advance directives
- Visit Prepareforyourcare.org provides free forms to download.
Talk to the people who care about you.
The POLST form is a medical order between you and your doctor, but it’s important that your family and care partners know that there are end-of-life treatments that you do and do not want, and that you have a POLST form and where to find it. By telling your family and care partners about your goals should a life-threatening emergency happen, it’s more likely that your POLST can be presented to emergency personnel and that your wishes will be honored.
Margot’s Story
Understand Your POLST Form Decisions
Next, take a look at the basic questions a POLST form asks as you contemplate what treatments you want and do not want.